Merry Christmas!:D
Man. I remember doing this last year, really like it was yesterday.. How did 1 year past so fast? Man... Feels kinda sad. But it's Christmas!:D so I can't feel sad! ^^ eating buffet now. Eat until damn full. My mum's reading the book my aunt bought for me, really testing it: I don't like this. Sigh. But. It's Christmas. So I'd rather not start a row.
Leaving soon. White collar is a damn nice show, and I found it online! Damn nice and easy to use and loads easily and has almost every show I want Eng and Chinese! Funshion^^ haha!
Kk gtg. See ya!

Happy merry Christmas eve!
It is Christmas eve right? I go double check
Yeah!:D
Wake up only liddat already. Help. Why liddat wan sia..

shucks, went for my jog. No energy now. Windows now responding, my Windows. Legs wobbly, hands shaky, muscle ache haven come yet. Now do wad?? Watch bleach!^^

T.T I haven run yet!!! I haven gone for my jog!! :(! So much for determination and perseverance!!T.T NO!! Imma gonna jog! Imma gonna jog when I get home! At 930 at night if I have to! Must stick to it this time!
Bored to tearsT.T why holiday liddat dee!? Sigh! Sigh! Sigh! Feel hyper tonight. Maybe it's cause I just drank COKe!^^ the second best drink in the world! The first is undoubtedly Pepsi! I haven made Ethel treat me yet!:( man! Oh wells, anyway guys supposed to treat girls:)! Sian sia! Ive been starving since this afternoon when Brian left my house! And I just ate now! At 836pm! My stomach's trying to digest itself! Churning away! Even after I've just taken spaghetti and a burger! What's wrong with me these days? Maybe it's cause ice been exercising more lately. Yesterday was a freaking long journey. Went all the way to Chinatown for the shirt, then went all the way to bugis to walk around until miss Aijing was ready, but she never got out of her shop till 1030 pm! I waited like 1.5 hours, talk to her awhile then zao alr. I swear she never seems to realize me standing around! So unobservant! Muahahahaha! Hope she sees this.
No matter. Pimples are always so unobservant xD
Now. What. Do. I. Do.
I know! I'll subscribe to Sam tsui. I've got to wait around here anyway.
I think it's a bad idea to jog late at night especially since I just ate food, but a must is a must. I'll go jogging^^ then head over to the exercise area and do afew sit ups and pull ups and push ups and whatnot until I feel like I'm gonna die first. Then I'll leave, and the pain will probably last for another 3-4 days. Can still feel the pain from the training 4 days ago now-.- I have to get more fit than this! Army will be the death of me.
Stupid phone. Every time I type a "me^^" it automatically puts in a "^^" right after it! And I can't get rid of it unless I backspace it manually! See ah. Me^^ Me^^ Me^^ Me^^ Me^^ why liddat wan^^ Me^^ . Eh!! Wan^^ also got! WTF?! WTF auto-capitalizes-.- stupid smart phones, quite dumb. Me^^ Me^^ Me^^ Me^^ Me^^ wan^^ wan^^ wan^^ wan^^ wan^^

So bored I have to do that.

Argh! Boredom is a type of stress!! I have to find something to kill boredom! But nobody wan^^ go out! And I have to save up on cash anyway, I've really been spending, although, I have controlled my spending so it doesn't matter. Okok, Imma gonna go already. Gonna leave the shop soon.
Me^^ Me^^ me^^. Hehe. That's actually kinda fun.
Offs!

Parents at home again.
So much for my holiday, looks like I only have January.
Seriously, why is it everytime Brian comes over, so coincidental something dumb must happen here too? Last time he came, I suddenly had to go to msia halfway through the day, otherwise, my parents will suddenly take impromptu leave on that day when he comes, or something weird must happen somehow. sian. Feel like going out altogether.
yeayea, think all you want. sick of this already so I'll just say what I want.
Seems like every person likes public holidays but me (at least, almost every person). Trying to get rid of this stupid vexation, but just cant get it off my chest. I hate going overseas, I hate public holidays, in very much truth, I prefer school days over both of these, so tell me, which part of my brain has been hardwired wrongly?? sian. Christmas, New Year, Chinese New Year, sure go overseas. I just want to be alone during my holidays, this is just so weird. Dunno what more I should say, just feel damn irritated for some reason, invalid reason though.

Well day. Left the house at like 1130+, and reached Bugis at like 1207, late by seven minutes, and guess whaat! I Wasnt latest ^^ Lol, at least I didnt end up earliest =.= Mr Organiser AKA Jordan Lam was the latest. Aint that great? For some reason, Organisers tend to be a tad bit late lately, either they're slightly late, or they're so late that they dont even trn up for the event =.= If I tell Cherie on him maybe she'll do something about him getting up so late, then again, the opposite might happen too, and I'll incur Jordan's wrath (which I already have on this subject) and he'll try to punch me again ^^ muahaaha. No matter. Where was I?
Oh ya, reached there, Chuw Teck reached dunno like 5 minutes before 12 I think, and so did almost everyone else, meaning Ben Cheng, Tan Teck.
Met in front of the fountain, and Jordan couldnt find his way there =.= So I sent my messenger Chuw Teck to go find him. hahax! anyway, met up, and walked to nearby Macs ( which is like 10-15 steps away from the fountain) to find it completely packed. So Ben Cheng decided we should go eat Mosburger (???) and it looked even more wonderful than macs. So we left for the food court, and I escaped to Macs to da-bao my Coke and fries, and burger but the burger is the least important part of the meal, not very nice wan.
For some reason today I keep heading off-track from my story ._.
Back to story.
I da-baoed it and went to Food Court Makan with them, then out of nowhere while I was eating my fries, Ben Cheng says he needs to bomb a toiletbowl. O.O U know I'm EATING!? HOPE BEN CHENG SEES THIS =.= They left to buy something from I-dno-what-stall. Sian, dont feel like typing suddenly.
After they left, I left to Aijing's stall, to find a missing pimple, so I just went ahead to the movie to wait for Chuw teck they all =)
Late
Watched Tron.
Played Arcade.
Played more arcade.
Played even more arcade.
Scary sia people just spend money like water to get these tokens to play games, siao wan. spam money like anything sia, I didnt spend a cent. Though it was fun watching them play =)
Left.
Finish.
yay.
Gotta go change the shirt tmr, hopefully got stock. then gotta go get something prepared. After tha gotta go see Pimple, maybe.
see how tmr.
Adios.

Feels so much better after that. All gone with the wind. Deleted.

Went jogging today, seems like I've deproved alot. I only ran 1.1-1.2 km, and I've never felt as exhausted as this. So I've decided, I'm gonna run 3 times a week from now on. Then went on to do sit ups, pull ups, push ups. All of which have deproved as well. Must get back into shape. I'll aim to pass army in a breeze! Haha!


Gonna watch Tron tomorrow. With Jordan, Teck wees! Hehe got 's', ben Cheng. Though I doubt it'll be much. Because to be very frank someone's just missing with this. You. Haha! I doubt you read my blog much anyway. And then some people read my blog but don't tag. Lol! Hehe. I know who. Anyway. Doesn't matter.

Can't WAiT for the chalet! But for the wrong reasons. I hate being in such crowds. And neither will I get the chance to talk to you when everybody's there. So I'll be most likely, by myself. Because entertaining is a tough job:) and there are only a few people who I enjoy talking talking to, very very, few. Besides, there's so many things to do! I'll watch a late movie, maybe I'll grab Kay Rui and tag him along xD!! Tie him to the cinema chair! xD Muahahahaha!! I hope he's reading this. He'll probably shake his head and walk off. xD. I'll buy pepsi! Like two years ago! I'll go sit by the ocean late at night and watch the waves! I'll go bowling! I'll stay up for 2 nights! So many things to do! I'll let all of them play xbox and cards and whatever. Actually I don't mind cards :D. But wii and xbox can go to hell. Waste time wan. I'll do whatever I want^^ LOL maybe horror movie at midnight! That's one way to keep awake! xD hahaha!! I'll have fun on my own if necessary, cause it's so much easier to be me!:D

I. Cant. Seem. To. Find. White Collar ONLIINE!! It takes like an hour to load the show!! I'm gonna rent it!-.-

Lol. Hospital also can be so homey wan. Both nurses here talking about their handwriting, haha! And the Indian guy in the opposite bed is probably the most optimistic guy I've ever seen. Judging by his diet, most probably down with diabetes mellitus. Grandpa's condition is improving, that's good:) the guy next to the Indian guy just got discharged too, lol, kinda old china guy, looks like he's in his 70s, but he was conversing very happily with the Indian guy. In fact, the Indian guy talks to almost everyone who's anyone, and very cheerfully too. Lol. I think he even had a laptop here yesterday. I've been here straight for the past 2 weeks already. Nurse is kinda chio. Hahaha! Not that it matters, chio doesnt mean like anyway:) very caring though, and always joking with the Indian guy too. Haha!

Man. Maybe I'll plan it somehow. But how sia? I Dno all her friends-.- Pfft. Forget it. Someone else would anyway:) automatically.

Next thing I gotta plan is what happens in january.

White collar is like, such a damn nice show, but, my computer seems to hate it alot-.- cause this computer of mine just doesn't listen to me and won't allow me to download the series of shows without having to wait one hour before it's done loading! I feel like dropping it onto the floor and then going off to buy a new one altogether-.- freaking old com! I'll send you to heaven.

... How do I enjoy my time with you till it's over anyway? Pfft. What a waste of thought.. Cause I'm the only one thinking of it..

Not bad. A fan. Haha! Must be quite pro if I have a fan. LOL

Anyway, who's passing rumors about her? cant be true, so I wanna find out the culprit. Anyway, I'll continue this till it's over next year.

Gonna become a tuition teacher. Dumb jobs getting in my way already, useless job-hunting skills I possess =.= Cant even find a job to take care of anything! Not even a FREAKING ANT =.= just an expression. I'm not washing dishes till 2am, so scrub it all.

What's going on anyway? Who said what? TELL ME?!

That's done. Looks like it wasnt as bad =) haha!
Now, for a change of playlist songs, listen until sian already. This should be much better. ^^ Sam Tsui and Christina Grimmie for ya! Nice Covers! Kudos to em.

I was such an asshole today. what on earth was I thinking? man. I should go apologise.

Nice day. Very, nice day. Maybe it's best not to mess around with people too much?
Brian got the job! Lol! Haha! I've got things planned too:) feels good. Will tun out good:)!

I have something in mind.
How do I go about this? =.= tch. mendo da.
I doubt it'll work?? No actually, chances of it working is like 30%, and then I'll just end up getting myself washed up. so. I shant =) I shall do what I initially planned then? much easier that way, because by right I dont have to go about this, it would naturally happen if I'm not wrong, which, hopefully, I am not, I hope, haha!
Man, sleepy like anything. too many things. please come one at a time can?

What do I type here? Since I cant type what I really want to type.
Why not I bluff myself, and hope I really bluff myself. I'm going out tomorrow to have fun. I hope that comes true, because I really have nothing much to say anymore, maybe it's just time. I really, have no more strength anymore.

Kinda confused, but doesn't matter yeah?? I'm in over my head as it is.
Cousin's comin over tomorrow, affecting my plans a bit, but it's kay, hopefully won't affect till half-way through the next week.
Having a sore throat now but I'm at burger kings xD haha! Gonna eat fries! The chilling here is best, not hot at all, just sweet!
Blurry.
I'm playing unbound again, lol, wonder if that's supposed to be a bad thing. It's kinda fun killing people off in one turn xD hahahaha! Especially the noobs. Don't even have time to retaliate, start game only my turn, kill already! Haha! Damn fun!
FEEL like buying avatar even though I know it's a waste of money, I suppose I'll go see how much the stuff costs, if it's too much then I'll hold it off, depending on how ex it is. If it's ridiculously ex, won't bother anymore, otherwise maybe I'll use my job money to buffer.
Damned job. Can't get a freaking job! I wanna get a freaking job!! Wanna! Damned it!!-.- FISH this. Why liddat wan?-.- Hais. I'll find a way. Gt eat. Bye~!

Damn! I haven bought the strings for the guy at Cgh yet!:(! I keep forgetting, I'll get it and send it over today! Damned it!

What's this about face here face there?-.-

Anyway. At Ang Mo Kio Hub now. And unlike Ehub, there's no bowling here:( was gonna go for a quick bowl before ming long comes BUT no bowling alley-.- sian. Now sitting around at the food court waiting for ming long, so might as well blog since there's really nothing else better to do.
And I just found out, asking for more ice in drinks in Germany is bad for some reason. It seems that they even have a law there that allows them to fill cups with drinks only to a certain level?! Mannn! I'm not gonna go there if I can't get Pepsi:( I'd be a very sad person if I'd have to drink room temperature Pepsi cause that is disgusting! It has to be cold! Apparently a foreigner asked for more ice and got chased out of the shop, and every shop she goes to gives her stares when she asks for more ice. Why on earth is that??!
Apparently there seems to several reason, although none really seem to be a very serious one for having to ban this-.- one of which is because them ice-making machines suck up alot of electricity to make ice. Apart from which, I have no idea WHY on EARtH they ban giving too much ice! Lool! Then when they give you ice, they can still only fill the cup up to a certain level with the drink, so the order-taker will end up telling you "you know, I will end up giving you less drink" but who the hell cares?! I'd rather drink a little pepsi with ice then alot of pepsi with no ice at rtp-.-! I'd end up torturing myself if I'd have to do that-.-

Ming long still sing here, so I guess I'm stuck. Aww well. I guess getting a drink won't kill.
Raging hormones these days-.- everybody around me^^ seems to be getting infected with em EXCEPT ME^^?! WADS goin ON?!
Actually, I think its safer to say I'm LeSs AFFeCTeD-.- not fully unaffected, eyes seem to fly over to girls for no apparent reason. Oh well, I don't plan on having a gf. Sick and tired of it already. Ming long's here. Bye.

Gonna get them. Sick of waiting for people who are waiting for other things. Want something done, get it done yourself.
After which, the ball is with Jordan, if I'm gonna stay over at ming long's tmr, I should go get it asap.

6/1 outing is coming up quick^^ haha! That'll be good! Not much to it huh?:)
Bowling, dying to bowl again:) at least such that every game I play, I'll get above hundred:)

Long day =.= so much for the 10p.h. job, was quite a crazy one, supposed to go to redhill some ulu area and ask old people, lower class people, ex-convicts, drug addicts, whether they wanted a job as a clerk at Sentosa Resort World or not. =.= and then the guy tells us when he did it, someone threw a glass bottle at his head before =.= I'm not gona get thrown glass bottles at=.= and even if I did, my dad would never allow it anyway, so now I'm stuck lookin for jobs again. I am sick of this. Gona get one simple job, and that's it, man, looking for one job is so freaking hard..

Never been so easy. Got a job for like 10/hr:) classified ads:) that pay is quite high already. Managed to get an interview for all 4 of us. Lol. Hopefully we get it. God's helping out :) job isn't that easy to get just like that:)
Ying Zheng's(? Sorry if I spelt it wrongly:( ) Brian and Jordan coming:) haha!

Ming long came over for a full day yesterday. Played xbox, com, piano, guitar, chess, lol. Went for lunch, etc. Then went for the Harry potter movie at 9. :( not exactly very fun, because I knew everything before it happened since I had read the book:(
Next week Wednesday gonna go his house sleepover, before that gonna play badminton and basketball:) basketball!:D
Egg tarts are here! Gonna eat breakfast! Bb!

Had quite a good day today. Half-crazy though, so weird.
And I got tricked by a couple of =.= Xin Ni, ur dead i tell u=.=
And I got over a hundred today for bowling!! Whoooohooo!! My training has finally paid off mans!! First time in my life I've gotten over a hundred cause I can manage it!
Ethel's gonna lose lor! Muahahhaa!
No matter.
I WAS INVITED INTO AIJING'S ROOM! I DIDNT SNEAK IN! I'M SO PRO!!! :D!! And Aijing's mother helped us get into her house! Looks like I should have bet! lol!! The worst thing to do is say "you're not allowed to do ____" because as long as it's not morally wrong I'd probably do it on purpose >:) hehehe!
Played Badminton in a tennis court for the first time in my life too =.= something I'd rather not record on this blog=.= Shoulda brought a tennis raquet, sorry pimples for all the white hair we've given you hehehe.
never bring trunks to swim, but then again, it rained, so it was a good thing we didnt bring. Furthermore, Aijing's sofa was damn comfortable, and the wind was freaking cooling, not to mention the view was freaking nice! Lol, so while Ian and Vanessa and Aijing were busy playing com, I fell asleep on Aijing's sofa! xD hahahahaha!! I shall not divulge anything about other stuffs i suppose, esp since it's in people's house.
Got pictures of Vanessa having something on her head, but lazy upload. got pictures of my first ever score above hundred too! But I'll upload it only on the other blog, maybe not today?=) so late already, cant really do much! EXCEPT SLEEP =.= SLEEPING is GOOD =.= should sleep EARLY =.=
Wonder how Ian and Aijing had dinner after I left. Pizza? Macs? loool! I wanna have dinner there too!!~ :( sianssss.
gtg sleep already, so tired. byeee!

A bit of time to blog now. Going out for "tuition". Haha. Got caught in heavy rain, lol, so just run through it lor, avoided them freaking puddles! Still drenched, but I've been through worst then this.
Once again, in mrt. My dumb phone likes to type a ^^ after the word "me"-.- so everytime I type it I have to delete it off-.- stupid phone, listen to your master and stop -.-
Mrt just reach Tampines also quite full already, damned rain is on a falling spree today. I woke up this morning, greeted by bright streaks of light, all the wayy till afternoon suddenly eyore's clouds come block out the sun-.- where's pooh when u need em?-.-

Gonna go into a tunnel soon -.- then I'll get cut off again, gotta save soon.
I'll bet my bottom dollar I'm gonna be the earliest for tmr's outing. -.- and they're gonna make me^^ wait for like an hour-.- again-.- sheesh. Maye I should arrive an hour late so I'll be on time:D. Sleep in the mrt and let it go to Jurong then all the way back to paya lebar before changing mrt to stadium. Lol. Going. Bye.

lol. I take that back. Not updating for awhile seems impossible. Suddenly nothing to do already.

Woke up later than usual today =.= 1009. wasting time sleeping. Must live life to the max! =)! unfortunately :( There really is nothing to do now. Gonna see fireworks at Vivocity later. I think it's a once a year event or something like that. oh wells. NOW WAD? Bleach no progress, Movie 4 also not out. Naruto is so boring, can take and throw in the bin for a few weeks. Job no response. What am I supposed to do now??? I know ^^ I'll eat Maggi Noodles! xD Eat eat. later maybe exercise abit. Who'm I kidding =.= Lazy do situps and weights today, maybe next week when there will really be nothing to do =.= that's gonna kill.

New blog opened. Now much easier. All the good stuff put here, all the bad stuff put there, block it forever, makes life so much simpler.

BORED BORED BORED. Maybe I'll even play Need For Speed on the Xbox cause I'm this bored =.= Ming Long also moved to Hougang already :( otherwise can go out makan with him or go his house too.. Kay Rui's gone off too-.- Never felt more bored.

Where's a part time job when you need one? sian. Bored like hell.

So far almost all my paragraphs have the word 'bored' in em.

I am Bored. Are you bored? Yes you're bored too, let's be bored together.

I have a friend named Bored, he lives in the same house as I.

Sigh. How lame I'm becoming. That's it. Noodles. Bye.

Today marks the end of work attachment :( dont feel happy though.. the staff there were very friendly, extremely funny also, haha! short while with them, feels like they're family-like.. sian.. only the very crazy guy =.= which shall not be named, cause he aint staff anyway =.= so =.= first day was the best though, even though i didnt attend the first half of that day, the guy who was incharge of us at the end was the BEST, mature, but sofriendly and funny :D!
Anyway, saw a lot of things there. CT scan, MRI Scan, X-rays, biopsies, dietetics, physiology, the nurses tending to patients, the pharmacy and how they operate, how they find stuff, what they're procedures are, where the stores are, how they stock up, medicinal dosage forms, poison classification, strengths, packaging of foods for patients, the kitchen, quite interesting.
Just got back, nothing much to do right now again. gonna watch harry potter!^^ !! with family though, although there's nothing bad about that, in fact, prob good actually.
done typing today, perhaps type again tmr.

Tch. Kay Rui's gone.. Feels like some part of me suddenly went missing -.- sounds gay. But seriously.. Holiday's gonna be so boring. Apart from that, there's really only one reason else not to feel happy.. Knowing the truth. Haha.. Catching the obvious truths.. I dont want the truths really. A few months ago, I kept getting dreams everyday, dunno why, but I've never got that before in my life. Dreams every night until can't even sleep.. Then I tried to stop getting them, took awhile, but got it, but now, lol.. Maybe the only place somethings can happen is in dreams.. So stupid. Tch.

Dumb day today-.-
Frankly speaking, I think the past three days were crazy. I've never seen anybody with such a crazy attitude. No. Not attitude. Character-.-! Almost killed me. Can't believe I still have 3 days more-.- I can't put up with that crazy dude for 3 days-.- 3 days almost ended my life already-.- I think many doctors and nurses and patients kena high blood pressure already. At least today he not as bad ad yesterday, still it was pretty bad.. But since the guy seems to be trying to change, I suppose he deserves to be commended?:) still, 3 days! I think I also gonna kena high blood pressure already-.- no wonder kena headache so much recently
-.- crap man. Why? Argh!!!! I can't be bothered anymore. I'm going out happily after this work attachment^^ no more madness.

what exactly am I allowed to do after exams huh? am I under house arrest or something =.= bloody hell. here also cannot, there also cannot, how old already still must ask whether here can go there can go =.=
There's nothing much to do at home. All the bleach episodes also watched already, all the naruto episodes already. Still cant go out, still stuck at home, no shows on tv, sick of piano, just woke up so cant go back to sleep, wtf?? nothing to do at all, the day right after graduation and I'm already feeling bored, now got 3 months of holiday nothing to do =.= right in front of me, 3 more months, and kay rui will be gone on monday :( gonna be very boring here without him. I'll buy him an air ticket back from australia^^ =.=
WAD EXACTLY DO I DO NOW?!?!?!?! Play hide and seek with myself or something?!?! Go jogging? lazy.. especially since its a saturday, hate weekends, always cant go out wan, wasting away time at home. Play Badminton? with who?myself? Basketball?court is too far away + no one to play with, saddening.
..wad kinda holiday is this? I'd rather have a normal day at sch =.= I'll restore my iphone just for the fun of it, then jailbreak it again=.= meanwhile, I'll sing songs
Somewhere out there, beneath the pale blue sky...
STILL BORED!
Being bored has finally become apart of me.
It's my middle name now, see : Justin Bored Lee.
WAD THE HECK DO I DO NOW!??! EVEN MY IPHONE HAS BEEN RESTORED!!! You got to be kidding me, freaking holidays and I'm stuck doing nuts!Great =.= now the stupid phone is backing up 238 songs =.= 238 SONGS! GONNA TAKE FOREVER! Haven even jailbreak yet. This was a mistake =.= just adding stress on to stress. lol, never knew someone could get stressed doing nothing.
My House Is In A Mess Full-Stop. Maybe I should clean it up asa passtime **** no way =.= Today you shall witness the longest blog post in history, cause I'm freaking bored.
Oh look! It's Eyore
=.= how do you even spell the Donkey's name
T.T I've never been so bored in my life
HEHLPLLP
I'll go on Msn and see if there's anybody I can pester for once^^!
man how sad can this get. only 2 ppl online???._. T.T!!
I've even rejailbroken my phone.
I think I'll organise an outing^^! who to invite? Kay Rui no doubt, how also dno, today cant go out, tmr sure cant go out, monday he go off already. ****! parents forever dont let me go out now what? =.= cant even see him off on monday cause of work attachment. All the ****ing things all in the wrong ****ing place. couldnt be more frustrated.
crap lost mood to blog. whatever.

Wonderful day.
Can't say that it was completely wonderful, because I was really pissed off in the morning, but still, :)
Bowled 3 games in the morning, 1st game I got like 2 strikes on my own:) then Ian wanted to bowl a little, so he bowled once and got a strike o.o! Lol, so I ended up getting something like 120 as a score:) could have got even better though, I had quite a lousy score after Ian helped me get a strike, 6 I think, so:( second game onwards cannot already:( got something as bad as like 58, then gave up for a while. Then after that i saw Teck wee curving the ball. So I dedicated another game to try and learn that, got the hang of it very slightly, not easy though, and the score was like T.T I think was like 28 or 21 I can't rmbT.T sad. Was fun though:)
After that Jia Qing was like "let's go Far East Plaza buy prom stuff!" so everybody agreed, ten instead of going far east plaza, go ion orchard-.- I was like ****! Jia Qing was trying to comfort me, so he said ":) nvm wan la^^! the stuff there can be quote cheap too! What's your budget?" I told him, 50 or less for a shirt, a pair of long pants, and blazer each. He was like " Oh! There Zara sure got wan la! Let's go let's go!^^" next thing I knew I was staring at a 100 over dollar price tag in Zara. Wonderful. Long story cut short, didn't buy anything. Jordan found something damn nice, suited him so well! I think Cherie's gonna marry him on the spot! Hehe!
Just reached home, 830, still kinda early. Oh wells!:) gotta buy food for family! See ya!

I'm trying! But I must do better than try. If I were to speak honestly, I say a majority of what just happened really does not make any sense at all. But I know it does, I know it must, so why is something inside stubbornly refusing to get linked with it? I need to link with it. I want to link with it. Why? Show me and tell me, guide me. Argh! What's going on?! It occurs to me as nonsense! That is just not right! Please! Stir in me your wisdom and show me! How do I make logic and religion link?! Faith! It is the true answer! Why can't I draw on it? Because I don't want to? No! Then why?! Because where is the logic?!why must it be blind faith?! Please show me the way. Lord god!

Mdm yeo now tells me she disagrees. Sigh. Looks like it most likely won't make it after all..
Shyt la. Whatever. See how it Coles along on Monday.

Finally the damn holiday starts to begin, at least it starts unofficially now. Although, I'm beginning to feel kinda worried about physics mcq. And not mugging doesn't feel too right. Now at mountbatten mrt on the way home. I suppose I don't really want Os to end. ... Sigh..

I think I'm finally through this bullshit. Dumb games anyway, now I'm sick of it.
Sigh. A mountain of things sitting patiently at home just waiting for me to clear them. Better get back to Mark in time too before he grills me. Lol, hope he doesn't see this.
By the way. The answer is in this, though I doubt only you'll figure, don't leave a tag, thanks. 9 at 2, 5 to 7, 8 but 4, and then when u get a fire represent eternity. -.- I could give u better riddles u know-.- lol next time you'll solve one. ;)

Haha! I finished ss today!:D first time in forever. But-.- there's always a but in these kinda sentences, I answered 13m not very too the point, which makes me^^ wonder, so what's the point of getting the paper done if it's been done wrongly?-.-
Went to teacher joyce's place today, and met melissa, as usual. Then suddenly got all sorts of commotion outside, and we see some guy from civil defense running around preparing a harness around himself and running off. We were like o.o. Then it was some worker who was painting the blocks. Apparently he didn't tie the gandola tight enough and the entire thing fell halfway, so he was stuck halfway up. Oh wells. So they prepared the ladder from the fire engine, got him down, scaled down the wall and so on. Must have been some exciting for the guy-.- at least no one was hurt. Sometimes it's best not to worry until you know what's the actual situation. Oh wells:)
Now on the way to tampines to collect something for someone:) so much for Os-.- it's more or less over for ppl, but I don't think I cam afford to slack off so much yet. When I'm getting back I'll mug Chinese again. And then there's Chinese tuition tmr again of course.

I wider if I'm really worried about Os suddenly. Watched A-team with my dad till 1 last night. Then today spent at least an hour plus watching Naruto. I don't recall it being like this before psle.. Durin psle I was forced to work like 6 hours no break, then half an hour break, then work all the way till 10 before going off to bed. And I started studying like 3 months before Os. Now I start 3 weeks before and I'm not stressed.. I got a feelin I might get an A2 for chemistry bio and physics because I made so many careless mistakes and left 1 page blank cause I didn't have time to think through it before I had to put the pen down. Emaths I wonder if I can get A1 also.. All the papers probably hard to gt A1 only because of careless mistakes. The paper I think I feel most confident getting A1 should be bio and amath. Apart from those all the rest.. Pfft. Oh wells. It's over. Once Os is over I'm not going to even think about what the marks are anymore. Whatever's done would be done, so theres no point thinking about it anyway:) just gonna live life to it's best. Lol. Come to think of it, I have been playing piano more these past few days.. At night especially. Must stop doing that at least till Wednesday is over. The worst papers will last till then. After which still can't slack. Must punch all the way through before letting go completely at the end of this.

Resume. Smile. Look. Endless power, all not within, but from above. Encase yourself in it. The new revolution. God's grace.

As of now, I'm dedicating this songs to all the cute little flies in my toilet.
It's called "No reason"

I'm not a perfect person~,
there's many things I wished I didn't do.
But I can tell you one thing~
I really meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before you go~
That I just want you to know

I don't like you flying in my toilet~
I hate it when you stand on my walls~
I dislike it when you sit on my towel
So please just go somewhere else~

I'm not sorry that I killed you~
I really meant to hit you with a slipper
But I continue learning~
cause I see you have six babies a day
-.- And I don't like them even though they're cute.
I think I'll stop here, this is stupid-.- get out of my toilet you ****ing flies

B g m p p! M * K M y l y! C w t s y l!
Hehehehe!! I can't get it put of my head even though ive deleted it from my phone!:( not my fault ar Jordan! :D^^
Sleepy like anything. Pfft. Eyes can hardly open. My life has returned to me:) hehe. It is minnne!! Afterso long really, it no longer poisons me.
Boo! Hehehe!

Last post for the next 6 weeks, if I can control myself not to use com for the next six weeks=.= which is highly unlikely. Skipped Chinese lessons today. Used it to catch up on physics. Now I've got to rush home to start on something else.. Perhaps chemistry?:) haha! I'd like to start doing that=.= cause that's the easiest to study. Amaris also need to buck up abit, emaths need to maintain. English need to do much better, because suddenly I can't seem to write compos.. Chinese need to pass^^ biology is a big problem, but not as big as geography and social studies... How sia.. How to study ss??

Why always looking the other side? Tch. Go figure. I need to settle other things now anyway. Gonna go. Sayonara.

Lol. It's time.

I'm not playing games here, so why does it look like I'm in one. Mind myself. Forget the rest. I'm sick of the response. Forget it.

.. Not bad. Now, how do I do that..

Sigh, forgot people's bday, so unbecoming of me.. Sounds like Nicholas saying unbecoming, lol, looks like I did pick up something, not bad:) =.= anyway, it's supposed to be a sad face there since I forgot bdays. Oh well. Just have to make up for it I suppose, 4 years classmate go out so many times, feel so guilty, can't let this slip off, last year also already.. Shucks, their presents I think will be slightly late, I think it'll take at least a week:(
Sian, today supposed to study wan, end up study a few hours in the morning only damn tired, so slept from 2 until now=.= which is like near 7 already. Baritone should be coming out later, although what I'm really waiting for is bleach. O lvls round the corner.. Shucks.. How sia.. Hopefully not too bad. Should look up the bio o lvls series again and try doing to get used to it. Then see if there are harder papers.. Although the bio o lvls series is hard enough already. All the data based questions are goin to kill me..
That Kay rui=.= suppose to reply mr on whether going to eat buffet today for lunch or not, end up never reply, so I ate Maggie noodles for lunch instead:( hungry hungry..! Imma gonna show him a world of pain!! Muahahahaha! Wonder how I'm going to do that.. :( and his mom now thinks i gave her a fake name when I called yesterday, cause mr Kay Rui says he doesn't know a Justin, and the guy who actually called was Daniel, next time I call, she's gonna scream at me=.= gonna do work already. Byes~.

Oh her eyes, her eyes
Make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment her
She wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think she don't see what I see

But every time she asks me do I look okay
I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails
I could kiss them all day if she'd let me
Her laugh, her laugh
She hates but I think its so sexy

She's so beautiful
Bruno Mars Just The Way You Are lyrics found on http://www.directlyrics.com/bruno-mars-just-the-way-you-are-lyrics.html
And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
Id never ask you to change
If perfect is what you're searching for
Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The way you are
The way you are
Girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

lol, quite a boring song, but the lyrics is very nice

went to play basketball today with kay rui and ben tan at geylang serai, freaking hell, first we got challenged by 3 secondary 4 pupils from another school, we were winning 6 3, then we swapped members, we lost 6 7 =.= that wan, tired us out like anything.
about 5-10 minutes later, a guy roughly 50 years of age came up to us and challenged us 2 on 2, me and Kay rui played against them, LOST LIKE ANYTHING! lol they kept saying they old already cannot play and all that kinda stuff, but really! THEY WERE FREAKING GOOD! Their teamwork was so damn good, all I saw was the ball flying around the court one after another the ball just flew right into the net. WE LOST 2 to 15!!!!#$%^&() LOL, but we picked up a few of the strategies they used, so hopefully it wont go to waste.
now at jordan's place. still thinking about wad on earth I should do next. I've finished watching Bleach, man, so bored. nothing to do. feel like smsing again. lol. but that's a bad idea. I cant talk, I dont want to sms so much, sighsighsighsigh. And there's this very cute looking fly flying around me in jordan's room keeping me company. Too bad for him I'm wearing long pants and socks ^^ and jordan has left this insect repellant spray on the table beside me.. looks kinda tempting you know. hehehe.
MAN I'M STARVING! Tmr got physics tuition, haven finished tuition homework. I'll try wake up earllier tmr morning to do it. Then maybe breakfast with kay rui and chuw teck they all. but I wont be going for the lunch thing and the cycling thing, dont feel like it.....
that's weird, no spiders in jordan's room today. less company :( where did they go off to uh? jordan must've killed em with that broom of his =.= killing off my cute friends. now so lonely here typing around. and this afternoon, I saw this friendly-looking lizard outside our classroom!! Freaking happy looking lizard was running about doing its own business, and curious little me was trying to take a freaking picture of it!! but =.=, there's always a but, kay rui popped out of nowhere, and made my good buddy run away helter skelter =.= so that's okay, later on when me and kay rui walked to videoworld for a late lunch, we ran into another of the same lizard's family members climbing a tree! trying to disguise itself as tarzan =.= failing miserably =.= It looked exactly the same! so I moved closer to shoot a picture, but this time round, my buddy ran all the way up the freaking tree cause he was freaking scared of me :( I not so scary lor!! end up couldnt get a picture of him :( lousy picture hunter.
still thinking.. what should I do..? or get? lol, friends.
okya okay, that's it. O lvls, straight ahead, everything else.. sigh.. not gonna work i think.
gonna preoccupy myself with something. byebye

opened.
so much to say that cant be said. lol. i think i should delete. so many posts, kinda lazy.. tch, there's not much difference in outcome either way, miracles dont happen much anymore. yet, still clinging on to some wierd invisible hope, that's probably not even there. tch, persistent thing this seems to be, cant get rid of it. either way, looks like not so free anymore.
Hmm.. Sciences I think still can study there, but humanities definitely cannot, it'd be too distracting. Made notes for chapter 19 already, lol. not very good progress really, looks like I work better at home, still, lol, it was good.
dont know what to say anymore.
Basketball skills, hehe, I've improved^^ Shija cant get pass me, I managed to cover Ben Cheng, manage to defend until Jordan cannot get past the 3 pointer circle at all and won 7-nil! LOL! FEELS SO SATISFYING! xD LOL jkjk. Dribbling also improved already, I suppose I just need the practice.
Up till now, still cant rmb whether it is practice or practise -.- oh well..
My phone hasnt come, but even after it comes, I'll just use my old phone when I go around people, dont want to make people feel I'm those kind of "rich kid", the old phone works just as fine and good anyway. lol, come to think of it, I couldnt be bothered what others think about me anyway.
shyt.. cant seem to do things without thinking about it.. lol, play piano also cannot anymore.. HATE THIS, I'm ME MYSELF and INDEPENDENT.. but then why? lol, come to think of it, the reason why we didnt really watch movie today was 60% because of me.. which was hundred percent cause plans changed. I have to snap out of this somehow. tch. gonna watch naruto, and then maybe bleach, leave it be, it'll disappear by itself anyway i suppose.

finally, looks like I'm really done soon with this.
Dying when doing physics now, done the O lvls book papers, all so easy. Then change to Anglican prelim paper, =.= all the mcq quesions seem to be so much harder than their structured =.= but both also cant do anyway, so what's the difference? =.= lesson learnt : go do prelim papers instead.
Got a new physics teacher, started tuition this week. The guy is extremely good.. So fast, very efficient, very effective, had my doubts at first, but he really is good. but expensive.. sigh. I suppose good things dont come easy. Done his tuition homework today, If I let it drag I wont end up doing it at all.
Expo tmr. lol. dont feel like going, nothing more I can put on this blog regarding this or I'd be offending people, full stop.
sian. Played bball with jordan today until so tired. Feel like gonna take a shower and then turn in already. I wanna wake up tmr morning at 5 to do work till I leave for expo. What a weird change of heart, lol. I dont rmb ever feeling like doing work. suppose some part of me suddenly belongs to A class. lol, never really saw myself as a whole with A class since the beginning. Looks like its grown on me somehow, lol.
Insomnia again last night =.= hopefully not tonight.
Drank two medium cokes today, finally beginning to get worried about getting diabetes. That's really not good, to drink that much sugar and CO2 in myself.
The world crumbles. pfft, what a world it was, what of it now? gradually fading off into the distance, but not disappearing completely, lol, weird enough for me.
I wanna look for the jay chou piano battle score, but I have no friggin printer, and I cant even find the friggin score :( I wanna FIND it. lol.

New physics tuition started today, was quite good, the teacher was super efficient. lol, got homework, I must finish it this time. cannot be lazy and distracted anymore. tmr hopefully can go jordan's place to do work. if not then, hopefully can go sch and do work, my mum taking leave tmr, sure cant do work at home confirm wan. school would be a good choice, until sch gonna look like nobody already then I go jordan's house, at least can maximise my concentration.
Insomnia last night.. tossed and turned for an hour and a half, then kept waking up the entire night.. couldnt count the number of times I woke up, all I know is I was constantly aware of being awake even when I was asleep.. stop thinking so much, it's bad.. stop getting distracted, only one way out of this. got to focus, I've been distracted for so long, where have I gotten? I can continue to get distracted after O lvls, not now... can i help getting distracted now in the first place... pfft, who cares anyway? what a waste of my time.... isnt it? .. sigh. One messed up life I'm in, making my own life a misery, pathetic, I should go back to being normal.. Why do I open up so easily all of a sudden? I never liked to open up in the first place to begin with, **** it was never even my nature.. how did I change? Maybe I should never have changed.. Then perhaps I wouldnt be in this mess.
Russell kena grounded liddat, cant go out, so I'm stuck being bored at home, even more lonely since I dont want to sms anymore, and I can only use computer at night, haven read other people's blog for forever already.. Maybe I'll go read.
Shyt, I have to call Jordan first.
K done.
sian... nothing left to think about suddenly, why like this ah? last time got so many things to think about, now morning noon and night all thinking about one same damned thing.. whatever, stuff it, I'll go preoccupy myself somehow. wad a dumb life. I'll get over soon anyway.. hopefully.

tch, maybe it's because I'm conversing too much, that's why I dream. I dont rmb ever dreaming about the same person at least once every 2 days before, if not more often than that. This is just damn stupid. lol, I dont think you not replying my very last sms of each day just happens to be coincidence either.. I suppose I get the drift.. wont be bothering you for as long as I can stand it. still.. now I dont know who to talk to again.. tch. gonna do work, maybe I'll sms kay rui if I dont know anything. though he most probably wont answer my sms =.= at all, dno why, it's always been like that since day 1 =.= when I ask him questions on science he doesnt talk much =.= must be his phone bill.
Got my sim card back, so my phone number can be switched back to the original one already.. but I dont feel like switching back just yet. So I'll use up all the balance in my present sim card for now first.
Taking a small break from work. 10 minutes left and I'll head back to it. Later got chinese tuition somemore.. sian.. and now got physics tuition every wednesday.. hopefully it'll help me boost my marks somehow. For now, I'll improve on chemistry first. Hopefully I'll get A1 for both these sciences.. and Bio as well, and both maths. lols, what fat hope. the last subject that I have to get an A1 for is English, die die must get. Chinese pass can already, but that itself is a problem.. Must pass somehow.. Must start practising again already. otherwise really will die.
Kay Rui not answering =.= as usual, who to ask... tch.. jordan most likely wont bother, Chuw teck most probably still sleeping, then again, kay rui too =.= I'm not gonna disturb you for a long time.. I hope.. Crap, then who? Cant ask brian.. Not gonna ask alston.. Dont have Ben cheng's number. Esther? lol, maybe then.
So restless. Had dont know how many dreams last night. Woke up so many times, but everytime went back to sleep get another new dream, only one was about you, another, if I dont rmb wrongly had something to do with Pri sch, and I can rmb Vincent Tan was in one of my dreams =.=, tch, the rest all cant rmb.. lol, I'm wondering if the primary school one was a factual dream. hehe! It sounded real enough to me even after I woke up and thought about it, maybe I should try to confirm it. hehe... oh well, cant hang around here forever, still got work.

Afew more posts to cover, and I'll open up the blog..
Somebody tell me, what's the point of going to sleep, and ever waking up? Why should anyone want to wake up again? What would be my objective in waking up to live..? To get a good stable job in the future, to get a wife, kids, a nice house..? To live life smoothly without so many financial issues? Is that it? To live life nicely till I'm gone from this planet? What would be the meaning, if I were to just live life away until it's gone? then what is it that I want? ..? Then tell me, what is the point of waking up, when the dreams I have are always better than this life I'm in? When the dreams I have are always about you? because reality is real and dreams are not? Where has reality gotten me? ... I like it only when I'm smsing you, but.. I can tell I'm bothering you, and I really shouldnt keep this up especially prelims are here, o levels are round the corner, and I'm still here, disturbing you every night.. I just want to sleep, and never wake up again, ever.. gone.. just like the wind, and maybe if you still think about me once in a while, that'll be all I could possibly ever ask for, satisfying enough.
Anyway, had Pizza, but my mum bought the small onE!! TOO SMALL! STILL HUNGRY! And she didnt order pepsi!! Usually I'm the one ordering, but I was sleeping just now, guess who I dreamt of?.. sigh, anyway, back to here. NO PEPSI! THIRSTING AND DYING FOR IT, AND STILL HUNGRY! I'll go steam pao and buy pepsi from white sands. Could use a nice stroll about now anyway, the night's always nicer when You're alone, because I dont think I've been not-alone much to begin with. I'm off, sayonara.

sigh, I keep knocking, but nobody opens the door. but if you choose not to open it, then there's no point for me to know.. because there's no meaning left in finding out at all anymore.... let me in, past the doors, into the depths of your heart.. and after that, maybe I still wont be with you, but at least I would've known you truly, unlike the others, whom you've refused to open up to.. I would have truly known someone I find important.. to me.. haha.. ridiculous.. over one person and I'm getting this.. so much.. too much.. I dont care..I'll wait, until there's nothing left to wait for.

lol, on the other hand, i think talking and joking with you already makes my day anyway =) the more you talk, the more i feel that you remind me of someone, lol, someone very familiar.

just finished tuition. early today, for once. nice day today.. very nice day. lol. not just because it's teacher's day, but mainly because I talked to you. lol. i dont feel like ever unblocking this blog now, because how on earth do I go about erasing ff the past 10 over posts that all have been talking about you? maybe I'll post a few normal ones, I doubt you'll check my archives anyway.

Tuition was ok, I forgot to bring the banana for the dog, must have made it sad, I MUST REMEMBER NEXT WEEK! The dog still barks when ppl enter the house or when ppl leaves the house =.= very fiercely=.= even at me=.=.= even when it usually does not bark at me =.=.=.= at all T.T walao, all because of his banana I didnt bring is it?! T.T Now the dog doesnt even high-five me when I tell it to =.= YOU DONT EVEN DESERVE HALF A BANANA damn it. bark at me somemore i tell you =.= I cut off ur banana=.=

anyhow, using very old, and very spare phone=.= it has like, crack right across it's screen, but it has some sentimental value to me, so i didnt throw it away after like what? 2 years? I had some really nice messages inside there, but they were all from someone else, the one before I liked you. I'm going to delete all of them, I dont know why, but I dont feel like deleting them, but I will. No point keeping them, I'm not thinking of her anymore..
Anywayy, the important thing here, is my screen is Friking CRACKED, and it's not cracked like an iphone, it's literally cracked into half =.= or at least the screen is. I wonder if I should make a police report on the iphone thingy. dont think it'll actually do much help though.. there's no way for the police to track it anyway. If i ever get evidence on who took it, i'll rip the guy in two and feed him to sharks=.= bastard, I'll repay him tenfold.

Anyhow, looks like I'm stuck for the time being. Prelims this coming friday, still studying format. What on earth do you use to sign off when it's an informal letter? Not yours' truly!? WHY!??! WADS WRONG with being true anyway=.= And I dont think it's yours sincerely either =.= And wads wrong with being sincere =.= shucks, all this kind of weird culture to write freaking letters, come to think of it, who on earth writes freaking letters now anyway =.= crap. Now wad? Seems like all the things we're learning is useless, I dont have any intention of having a job related to either history nor geography =.= I dont remember ever writing letters, although I've received one, for sentimental primary school values when we graduated, either than that.... =.=

Anyway, went to get a present for Yan Qi, her bday falling smack in the middle of prelims. lol, at least get her something to lighten her mood i spose. then I got myself a kepo^^ Now can strum any key!! Yay!! So happy. dont have to keep singing in C major anymore =.= so low.

And I dno why, but i really look up to Mr Edwin Lim alot, although many NCC landers dont like him, I think he's great. He's super friendly, knows when to be strict and when not to be strict, doesnt blow up very easily, muscular, nice voice, I dont know wad to see in him that's so bad for ppl to use the word hate =.= such a strong word, I dont even think I hate anyone yet. no, wait, maybe the guy that took my phone, yup, that'll be like, I wanna kill you, not hate=.=

Very long posts these days, maybe you wont see the rest at the bottom, lol, maybe I'll do that. =.= not gona erase what I recorded. Astala Vista.

lost my phone.. or rather, lost it to someone else.. I keep seeing those stupid chinese compo tests, saying that newspaper reportings sight that teenagers cannot live without their handphones, and I've always thought that was rubbish, in a way it still is, but it's not in another.
I've lost a phone, worth a few hundred bucks, do I feel sad? yes. but for the wrong reasons..

...why? Why? WHY!? I lost a phone worth a few hundred bucks, but I'm not sad because I lost these few hundred bucks.. I'm sad, I feel crushed, somewhere inside, it feels pain, but not physical, why? because I cant talk to you, and because I've lost what I've planned to give you, which is stored in that phone. I lost evidence of that memory, that I wanted to give you as a going away present.. That was my main intention, for even taking a picture with you that day, and now, I've lost it.. I've lost it... What a childish reason to feel sad for.. I should be feeling sorry for losing the phone because my dad bought it for me, and because I've wasted away his money.. yet.. I'm feeling sorry for myself, for all these stupid reasons, these reasons that are completely useless, because you say I dont even have a chance with you, then why? why am I feeling this if I know you wont accept me? why? why am I feeling this? why? why?? I feel jealous.. when you talk to other guys, even when I know they're not going for you, and you not going for them, but I feel it, I dont want to feel it.. I want to forget it.. I put up a happy face and say, nah, it's fine with me, I tell everybody that, but i cant feel it, I cant feel what I say.. I want you. I want to have that chance with you.. but it looks like I'll never get it.. I want to see you laughing because of my jokes, because of something I said that made you happy.. I want that so badly.. so much.. but.. now.. I cant even give you what I planned to give you, I planed it out, every little thing.. every part of it.. but I screwed up, I lost everything.. I lost the picture I looked at when I felt sad, when I felt troubled, when I felt irritated, when I felt bored, when I felt angry, all that's left is the picture in my head, the very same one that I can bring up, but disappears just as easily as I brought it into view in my head. I've treasured everything I've ever had with you, come to think of it, I've never deleted one of your messages since months ago, I feel alive again when I saw those.. I lost all these evidence of these memories, not only about you, but in a way, about jordan, kay rui, chuw teck wee, xin ni, aijing, shu tong, almost all the happy times I had. I still have all that in my head.. but.. I feel so sad about losing it.. I cant even talk to you in person... I feel.. I feel so.. so.. sad.. I can always chat with you, yes? I have a sim card here right with me now. I have a spare phone here right with me as well.. but I feel like I'm bothering you.. I feel like telling you, how much I think about you, how much I feel about you, how much i would give for you, how much you really mean to me.. I feel like telling you everything, everything inside me that hurts like hell, how much I just want to see you and talk to you, a nice conversation with you can be my birthday present, I dont need anything more than that.. but I cant speak, I cant tell you, I cant show you, how much exactly I feel for you, yet you talk to other guys so easily, I cant stand it.. I just..cant take it.. I try to get you out of my life. It's hurts as hell.. I dont sms you for one day, and i dream about you, I want to tell you so much.. but you cant accept me, I cant talk to you, and the more i do, the more i find that you find me irritating.. you're not as open to me about your life as you were a few months ago.. can we go back there? ..... I dont want to make a wrong move.. I want to make you happy.. I want to do so many things, go out with you and have fun.. but because I'm stupid.. because I'm quiet.. it's just not my nature to express myself at all when I'm talking to you or anybody else at all.. I cant even think about what to say anymore, that's why i always listen when there's a conversation going on.. please... I dont know what to do anymore... my studies, my sleep, my pain, my calm, piano songs, my entire life, all controlled by you.. and I cant break free, I dont want to break free.. so many I wants... why wont you tell me for once.. what do you want? what do you feel? what are your troubles? how is your life? what food do you like? where do you like to go? what do you look for in guys? how are your friends like? what is your past like? why would you rewind back to when you said you would? would you like to stay back and study...? would you feel sad leaving sg, what songs do you like?.. anything... anything you wish to tell me.. I'm here, just waiting, waiting for the words to come out of your lips.. tell me about yourself, I know enough rubbish about myself, I'm sick of everything i know about myself, I want to know everything about you.. but you're sealed up.. and I cant open you up.. I've tried so many times, but I'm very sure there's someone apart from me whom you've at least confided at least something to.. I dont want to know from anyone else, I dont want to find out about you from others.. I want you to tell me yourself, with your own will, with your own lips.. then, there's meaning for me to know.. then, there's a feeling in me that says you told me, you chose to tell me, there's a meaning in it in itself, that you trust me enough to confide in me.. I have not gained that. I have not gained all these, I have not gotten anywhere.. I just feel my own pain.. but... I still have the memories living in me, and I'll wait, until you're ready, until you choose to open up, until you trust me, until I am comfortable expressing myself around you, until I am able to make you laugh and smile because of me, until I can get rid of the envious feeling in me, until you will shine some light down into this dark blind heart of mine, because it's been empty, and it's telling me to tell you.. i really really, really like you... I'm going to sleep. goodnight..

Didn't sleep well last night, woke up in the middle of the night thinking.. Tch. Tired.. Just finished tuition, i feel like smsing again. But there's no point really, if I'm just treading on to your nerves.. Feel down and depressed. Can't let it affect me. I still have work waiting for me at home.

Just ate lunch. Ate quite alot, starving. Appetite's been growing lately.

Ok. What work should I start on when I get back home? I'll revise my bio notes, then I'll attempt the next section of the paper and hopefully I won't have to refer to the book for any of the questions. Then if I still have time, I'll start revising one of the chem papers I have, and if I sill have time, then I'll start on one of the chem rev exercises that's due after holidays. Doubt I'll hve that much time though.

... i swear, i dno what's gotten into me. I dont even know what's so special about you, but I've never dreamt of anyone I ever liked before for 2 consecutive nights. It's like after I've blocked you out, you enter my dreams instead, what's up with that?

On the other hand, Kay rui almost getting scorched by me was not a very nice experience, but he should have at least told me he took away the damned thing before he screwed up my anxiousness for damned nothing =.= idiot. hope ur reading this Kay rui=.=

I've made one more resolution. For the next year, I'm never going to divulge any secrets to anyone anymore except the one person I always have been. No more. If I ever divulge anymore secrets to anyone but her, I'll kick my own bucket =.= This is going out of hand.
And one more thing. From this day onwards, I dont want to know about other people's secrets that are not related to me in any way anymore, unless it concerns anything related to what I'm currently worried about, which I shouldnt, really.

I'm trying to get it done.. I'm putting in more effort, but this.. it doesnt feel like enough. Not anywhere near. O lvls is a month away. I'm not anywhere near prepared. going to mug. bye.

I've dreamt again.. what's going wrong..? 2 times? consecutive nights? i must be losing it..

Last PE lesson..

I tried to block it out, guess what happened? I dreamt about you instead. When I woke up this morning I lost track of what the dream was about, but the second after I woke up, I told myself to go back to sleep cause I wanted to continue dreaming.. Then after bathing and showering and while eating breakfast, I tried my best to recall the dream, and, I did. I felt jealous in the dream somemore.. What kind of rubbish is this, how can it be affecting me up to this extent, ridiculous. I try to block you out, I don't try bot to talk to you for one night, and the moment I try talkin to you one night later, I can't block you out-.- wtf.. What's wrong with me?
Played in the same game as you just now, feels damn nice, nicest way to have a last PE lesson..

Very bad stuff happened today. First thing was this morning whilst talking to Germaine, my convers was overheard by who I was talking about, I suppose since I dared to say such things then I should not be afraid to let him hear it, he knows it anyway.

Then, today happens to be the last PE lesson ever in this school... So saddening.. Feel like I've lost something in me..

Found out something today, rather shocking, and the events as well.
And then found out today that baldy really has no sense in buying presents=.=

did all the bio work she gave today, even though she said not to do mcq and essay questions-.-(I just found out essay questions actually means the entire section b) ended up doing everything except last question today. Then there's that maths paper.. Haven done that yet. And have 2 chemistry papers as well. I plan to do those on Monday and Tuesday, hopefully. I have to finish all the homework before holiday starts, so I can catch up on revision.
Shyt I tink I left so
ethi g at jordan's place. Went to his place at 730 or so, played guitar with him and sang:D damn fun.

I think I'm bothering you, cause if I feel I'm bothering you, then I think you should be able to feel it too.. I think I've practically talked every night, i don't know what's wrong, maybe I'm over sensitive? Telle if you're angry ok? Sigh, no point writing it here, and you're too kind to say that anyhow.. :) talked to you for once face to face and actually see you smiling a bit after so long, I think I've lost it, feeling happy about insignificant things, stuff it.

Blocked ears, sleepy, and really worried about physics.

Taking medicine again, stupid cough won't go away.

My dad hired a horror film=.= Ju-On, and he wants to watch it now at 10-.- how on earth am I going to be able to sleep after this..?-.-

I think about you, too often, it's affecting me.. I'll just remain hopeful :) until we part at least:) or get together. I think I'll clear this after unblocking my blog. Hopefully I'll remember, and no be lazy-.- Ju-On, great=.= nightmares tonight for me. Nite, to my blog. hehe

Man, feel so much better after sleeping, headache's completely gone, it was a nice dream while it lasted, but in a way, I'm glad I'm back in reality:) there's not much meaning to it if it's not real I suppose:) but it was nice while it lasted. Lost count of the number of times i've dreamt of you feeling happy cause of me already, but that's so not real in real life:) waiting for a miracle huh? :) oh well.

Rain rain rain=.= so freaking wet everywhere. Can't believe this kinda nut weather, outside like got aircon liddat so cold=.=

Ben Cheng was walking out the hall today, and he rammed his head into the half-open shutter on the way out. Walao. Jialat. Then he lying on the floor, I don't know is real or exaggerated wan. Mr lim was there, he was like "oh my god, Ben Cheng, you ok not? " LOL, but seriously, this kinda thing like only happen in comedy movie wan lor. And afew days I remember khai qi was walking past with Sara and 2 other girls, then khai qi said hi to me, and the other girls with her all looked at me, then I replied hi, and one of the girls rammed into the pillar outside our class, laughed like siao. Hahaha!! All the weird stuff that seldom see happening all happening. Hahahaha! Russells coming over now. Got to go. See ya:)!

Never felt worst.. Slept at 2 last night just to finish up the sgc. That's not the main problem though, the worst thing that could have happened, it rained like crazy on the same day we had PE, and I played during pe, usually I do not if it rains. And it so happens I slept late last night or rather this morning too, making things all the worst. I have been having an extremely strong headache ever since PE ended, most likely due to my scinus(?), the pressure in my nose built up all the way to the centre of my head, pain like hell. And then the pressure went stright up my ears, so I couldn't hear anything either. Plus lethargic like hell. Supposed to stay back in school till 7 for work today, but I can't stand it any longer, going home now, feels like crap.. Really bad. Didn't eat recess or lunch because I wanted to print out the sgc, and it cane out wrong several times. Feels so drained, no energy to walk much.. Gonna go home and take a few pills for this stupid nose block and then go sleep.
Don't think too much. Just let it happen, Justin.

sigh, it would really make my day.. if you just texted me instead for once..

long day today. but chem test went exceptionally well, at least I understood a majority of what I did. except the parts I missed when I wasnt in school. parts on creating a cell, or something like that. apart from that, everything went nice and smooth until I met a certain question =.= it's name was "what happens when you combust ethanol?"=.= the question said it was crbon neutral, and I took it as no carbon dioxide would be given off =.= instead, I was so clever, I created new products, apparently, when I burn ethanol, I get glucose and water instead, nice right? now I just need to prove that when you burn alcohol, you get glucose.
I swear mrs Tan is going to kill me when she sees that. Hopefully I actually get an A1 :( have gotten one for a long time..

Still coughing my wa through the day, cant eat chicken chop :( I WANT CHICHKEN CHOP =.= hopefully I recover by tomorrow, then I'll go eat 2 plates of it.

Tuition ended extremely late today too, cause chem test made school end late, and even after I actually spent effort to rush to tuition, I was late even later than usual, so stayed until about 8 at tuition instead of 7. just got home at 815 pm =.= what a nice day =.= now I have to go out again for dinner. I hate going out nowadays. Gonna stay out tomorrow in school till 7 also or so, going to mug already. If I dont catch up, I'll be toasted for this prelims, which is like 2 weeks away, I cant believe we're so close to O levels, time flies like nuts even when you're not having fun.. How I wish I could turn back time.. Go back to Primary school, when I didnt have to bother liking someone until I practically think of her 24/7.. dumb raging hormones. although, weird thing is, usually you'd like someone because she looks great, I like someone plainly cause of character =.= maybe I've studied til my brain got fried.. sigh, still thinking thinking, but that's never got me anywhere, so why do I still hope for it? sigh.. wasting time willingly and knowingly.. Am I being dumb? anyway, going back to primary school also means 4 subjects to cope with, and all of much simpler dificulty than now =.= no alcohol that burns to form glucose at least =.= didnt even have to know what on earth glucose was =.=, shucks, complicated world we live in.
Come to think of it, everything's complicated, even though I've never really bothered about any of it. Love is complicated. Studies is complicated. Relationship with friends even, is complicated, sometimes I wonder who it is I can really rely on..
Sgc, haven done it at all. $%^&*$%^&*(%$! cant stand all this. Doing SGC is Rubbish. it's all talking about how you can praise yourself =.= what good is doing that? end of the day, all the teachers have to try write something good about you based on it, and what we're actually needed to do is crap a load of rubbish on ourselves.
Great, going out to eat again. just wonderful. Where is my steak! CHICKEN CHOP=.= cant eat it yet.. sigh.. so sad.

哀れな..あなた..私が好きな人は、私の大好きなので、多くの、私が好きなように見えることはありません。あなたも私..見ていけない私はあなたにテキストメッセージを話すことができます唯一の方法はありますか？ ...してください.....私と話をする... エセル.

Better today, think I'll return to school tmr. Went through a physics paper, got the entire thing wrong, then looked through the answers.
Still coughing, sigh, back to school tmr when there's all three sciences on the same day-.- boring like anything.
Piano exam's been called off, don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but at least I'll have more time to focus on the o lvls instead. Wasted the past 10 months playing the same few dumb songs too. Oh well..
I'm starving!! I want chicken chop! And steak! And French fries with super alot of salt!! And coke!! Ethel supposed to go out with me and eat after prelims, but prelims so far away!! I want to eat now!!:( starving!! I want curry! :( I want prata with sugar! I have a damned bottle of pepsi in the fridge but I can't drink it!! Arghhh!! I've had it with soup and bread and oatmeal! I want A FEAST! :(. Not that I'd go out with marcus's group for it=.= no offense, but I'm not the talkative type.
I want biscuits!:( chicken pie!:( yam pao!:( spaghetti!:( chicken drumsticks!:(.............

Looks like imma gonna havta eat something first:) !! Whad shoulda eat?^^ :( dunno wad I have at home, curry noodles, out of the picture, biscuits!:) in the picture^^ I've never had a problem being skinny after eating like crazy, imma go makan!!:D!!

Still sick=.= cough cough wheez wheez I'm sick of it. Nosebleed last night somemore, can smell that disgusting dried iron smell when I breathe in=.= went to see doctor again today, ran a test, found out it was influenza B. Oh well. Hopefully I recover soon, before this Friday at least. Im seeing stars as it is.

Pfft, let me in already. I've been standing outside your doors, knocking and knocking, but you've never opened up your gates. Sian. Understanding, is not easy to come by at all like this.

Coughing again. Diarrhoea. Damn it! If I don't recover from this soon, I'll.. Do something=.=

sick like anything, still havent recovered, and to make matters worst, I had nose bleed this morning. antibiotics doesnt seem to be as effective.. only thing that has dropped is the fever, it's still lying low at about 37.3 or so. haven done any work.. gonna have english oral soon as well... how sia? I usually never do anything for english oral.. drats, hopefully the topic is easy to talk about.. maybe I'll go look up some topics..

Pfft, fever 39.2, and I'm going to school. I think that's about the limit for me.. Sigh.

You texted:) lol, made my day. Don't know if you were really sending it to me with the intention I think I feel, but I was happy to just see the words, and your name.

Now going sch, I think I'll stay a distance from you, and the others. Crazy fever=.= drop to 37.5 alr then dno how go back up to 39.2, tmr dno whether can go sch or not.. Sian. Hope I recover by today.

Of all the days to fall sick, it has to be on a Thursday when all the science lessons are on the same day. I wonder if that's a good or bad thing=.= miss out everything but don't have go through 3 and a half hours of boredom. Hehe, nope, changed my mind, that's definitely good. HeheheheT.T change mind again.
Woke up sometime dead in the middle of last night, thirsty and coughing=.= ytd's mild cough has taken it's effect today I spose=.= still, here I am blogging. Should be doing work or something=.= I think I'll go back to school in te afternoon for that stupid English test. Don't want to hae to take it on some other dumb day again-.-
As I was lying in bed this morning, I was half asleep, and then I see your face there in the darkness of space with my eyes closed, and all of a sudden, a song starts playing, what song? Completely newly composed song, never heard it before anywhere=.= man, I must be losing it! Anyhow, I was trying to come up with a song the past few days, with lyrics, the lyrics meaning I wanted was how I wants to say, how I felt about someone. And now it just pops out when u least expect it. Lol, fumbled out of bed at 715 in the morning to write the song out onto a score, though it's kinda incomplete, but I got the chorus and part of the bridge=.= wrote it even though I was sick=.= beginning to wider if ishould have gone to school=.= no matter:) I'm glad I finally made it, lol, should I dedicate it to you? So freaking awkward. Hehe. Oh well. We'll see how things work out along the way:)

and I owe mr Philip Wang my book. Was supposed to lend him today. Guess I will, later maybe, when I go for the english test=.= he's been hounding me for 3 straight days, I think I really should remember to bring it later or he'll skin me.
Bodyache everywhere, slight fever, runny nose=.= coughing, ears blocked, throat inside got some damn stuck up virus tugging my nerve like he's having fun liddat=.= sounds like ENT to me too=.= except a worserer version=.= worserer was on purpose.

Kay rui just texted me to ask if I was sick, awww, I feel so touched. Sobzsobz, next thing you know ritesh will sms me too=.= .. I wonder, will you text me?:) oh well, guess it unlikely huh?

Im gonna go read book, and then go watch bleach, and slack the hell off of me=.= discipline discipline, I think I left that in the fridge=.= maybe I should go get it, discipline, that is=.= it's miraculous I made it into A class=.= don't feel like studying at all! damned darn it. Nothing to do:( read book play games^^ bb.

... I don't need anyone. My troubles will be stored only in me from now on.. I wonder how is it, that even I can't feel it? I can't feel it, I can't feel so many things anymore, I want to feel your character again, I the one that lit me up.. When I felt lonely.. Haha, looks like my dreams are the most real thing I'll get after all.

I don't rmb having dreamt about the same person so many times in a week before. 3 times in a week. Shucks..
No discipline.. I must try better than this.

Given up on being sad:)

so. Today. I shall twell u a stwory.

Once upon a twime, there stood a kingdom, so united and stwong, it was unrivalled by either friend or foe.. This kingdom stood surrounded by a vast ocean, with countless battleships that pwatrooled everyday.

One day, a fwary came down from heaven, and granted the king of this kwindom one wish.
The king wished for a rival, to match his pwower, the fairy granted him his wish.

2 days later, Kay Rui walks into the king's office and says hi.

I'm joking.

The next day, it was heard, that an entire nation was built overnight, 300 kilometres from the almighty kingdom, it's entire area running with soldiers with all sorts of weapons. But this kingdom had one weapon, that could take down any mortal, regardless, it was not seemingly true.

The king felt confident, but wanted to test his full potential. He sent his entire armada charging towards This kingdom, thrusting his full force into this gambit.

There he sat at his thrown. Expecting the good news, and suddenly, a dark figure appears at the doorway of the massive hall. A single person. No weapons. No Armor.

He walked slowly into the thrownroom, one step at a time, one sound at a time, and then suddenly, his pace quickens.

The king pulls his magnifent sword out of it's sheath.

The sound of his footsteps grow quicker, and louder.

Kay Rui takes off his boots and says hi.

The king and the assailant both teo stun.

Rubbish. Cancel out that part from Kay Rui.

The magnifent sword fell through it's target... No blood. No screams. Not even a cut. It was as if the sword went right through this mysterious person.
The king's eyes widened in horror, beads of sweat treading down his forehead, and suddenly, the assassin disappeared.
The king, filled with shock, looked about for the trickery being played on his eyes, but found a piece of paper on the exact spot the assassin once stood.
He uncrumpled the dirty dry piece of paper, taking a look at the bare words on the piece of paper, tears filled his eyes. Tears of regret, tears of sorrow, tears of pain, and at the same time tears of happiness tears of hope, tears of the heart.
His entire army came back impact, they found nothing, not even the kingdom. The citizens of the kingdom all relieved. This kingdom never fought another battle with swords after this event, and in a corner of the king's heart, the words on the piece of paper remained.

...... Sian. Words words words.. I haven come up with the words yet sia. Good thing u read my entire essay.
Ah! Words I knoe le! Actually only 1 word. Baldy!! Ten the king saw already then cry lor. Can Right can right? :D

The anger I feel for you will disappear,
for from the dust we came,
to the dust we will go.
For this feeling,
I have felt countless times,
I have held back countless times,
for I know you are older than me,
for I know I would be disrespectful,
and for those very reasons,
I have not done what I have should not.
Yet there you stand,
forever creating,
creating and creating,
only one damned thing,
hatred.



On the other side of me,
Is a feeling I cant extinguish,
Is something so strong,
that even the maker of this feeling cannot put out its flames,
the same flames that burn into the very organ that pumps blood through these veins,
the same flames that have fused into the heart, but have escaped the mind,
yet, it has not been received, though countless times it has been hinted to you.
soon, these flames will be put out,
and I will no longer have to succumb,
to anything as ever stupid and useless as this worthless thing, that has only brought me sadness and self-condemnation,
this useless thing called,
Love.

The last week, the last post, the last bit of fun left.
after this, I shall not feel, I shall not burn, I shall not love, I shall not regret,
after this, I will focus, concentrate, I will sprint all the way to the end of this race,
then I will look back, and tell myself,
What have I done?

The same. But I need to focus. Not on this kind of stuff.

Now in mdm yeo's class. Finished her compre already, but nothing to do. She busy accomodating Eric, and probably won't bother about me using the phone either way.
Man, all my subjects kinda weird now. Not picking up even though I've put in more effort than usual. Maybe I'll spruce up maths first, after all, can't afford to get lower than am A1 for a and e maths. That's the easiest subject to score in. Now so boring..=.= later gonna get bio still. Die! Sian sia, acting so monotonously. I think it's just me anyway. My sweets are like depleting at like a spontaneuous rate=.= many thanks to Philip and and his gf. Both mugging their way through my sweets. "Justin can I please have one?"
"of course luh!" I'm such a nice guy>:D later got poison. Hehehe, na la, not so bad; I shall share my sweets! Until I've got no more of them, yupyup, no more of them, until I'm starving, I'm starving, I'm freaking starving, but no worries, I'm just FREAKING STARVING W/O Any SWEETS=.=, come to think of it, actually, I want to drink pepsi... Shut, bio.

k, went for 2 movies today. Eclipse, and Knight and Day.

Eclipse, I went with Kay rui, Chuw Teck Wee, and ben cheng. hehe! Chuw teck wee likes to hear stuff wrongly, and reconstruct sentences, such that it makes not only no link to the topic, but is damn sick, and doesnt even make logic sense. LOL. THAT GUY. hehe! BEST SIA! xD!
Kay Rui also =) had a lot of fun today with them and cheng.

Knight and Day, just went for it with parents. 1146pm now at home =)

I came across something today:
The heart has reasons, that reason does not understand.

sort of ironical, but it holds strong. =) for once, reason must actually make sense. ^^ I'm not going to think about it anymore. finally. I'll take things in my own stride, and let things fall, or build up, by themselves. never felt so good in a long time. no worries. =)
that's about it for my post. Gonna wake up early and do what I want to do for once. Basketball practice in school before allthe ruckus. Nites all!

I dont know how should I feel.
Maybe it's just me, again,
so many times I've felt so much,
When I'm around you, not doing anything,

Listening to my songs, your picture in my head
I feel the emotions,
happiness,
sadness,
confusion,
a surge of energy accumulates inside,
but why? I dont see why i feel all that thinking about you.

Is it looks?
no..
Is it attitude?
... that must be it?

A little bit of dejection puts me off,
I want out,
I know the result,
I feel it now,
after your sentence, the one before me,
even that insignificant "no" over such a small issue,
I feel sad, speechless.
I never treated you like this before, just a normal friend,
how did u get here? why did u get here? why cant u get out.
.... I dont know what to feel already.. I feel lost.
Leave me lost, leave me be, I'm in my own world, fake heaven,
seemed possible once, but now shattered, the soft feeling inside me, is actually pain, wth is wrong?

god show me, show me my way, show me what to do.

Get out of me, I dont want to feel it again, so many times, I've seen this before, I know what I'll feel at the end, I dont want to feel this again, ... let fate guide me, my ending, bring me there.
I'll put in my useless effort, I'll try to act normal, I'll be a friend. Because that, that is what you truly feel this is, then, that is what it'll be, no more posts regarding this. this is the last one. good night.
...

I dont know what to think anymore.. studies is most impt.
wandering around blurly with no sense of direction. not exactly the best idea I've had.. entire morning screwed up.

yesterday, nth much, supposedly had a primary school SCHOOL outing, not class outing, sheena invited everybody she could think of. didnt really want to go, but russell talked me into it, he said he wanted to go awhile only, so ok lor, went, i think i only knew like 5-6 ppl there? Sheena, Jing Han, Zulfarhan, Yushan, the other 20 over ppl i dno who. dno why debby and celeste never go..
left early, like 10 minutes after reaching there, feeling so extra go there for wad also dno, russell was playing around with the autotune app on my phone.

got to downtown east, went for a movie The Legend of Ip Man, reached home damn late, abt 12 something..

and then, my phone jammed, spent one hour and hacked into its stupid database, so many programs inside until it took me an hour plus to even look through them, deleted afew programs that were causing the stupid jam, and fixed the phone, lol, replied ethel very very late, then 1am or so in the morning, fially went to bed. =.= wake up, all the nonsense again. now right hand grazed, left hand bruised slightly, and dno how i got the little cut on my right hand, it would have been worst if i whacked the person who deserved it and not the punching bag.. russell came over abit, now okok alr.
holidays almost over, but cant get rid of the holiday feeling.. Need to do something about this now!..

Really nice day today. Was looking forward to today =).
Got up bright and early, 730am, showered changed etc, u get the idea, then at 8, went for breakfast with Russell, KFC, NOT inappropriate for breakfast i wanna add, hehe!
Reached back to my place, watched phua chu kang on youtube, lols, with Russell, damn funny sia seriously, dno how I got sucked into something like this, not my fault, hehehe! Ronald MacDonalds fault =.= stupid, look for ronald macdonalds until end up like this.
Anyway, left home at about 955 to meet *erhmm*Ritesh*erhmm* (I'll be using that often now^^, hehehe!!) for a celebration. I thought it'd be the usual kinda thing, that I'd reach there early and wait for Miss Chiobu (to create mysterious atmosphere, I wont say name^^, hehe!) to come, cause everytime I go out on outings I organise, everyone comes late and I always come too early, so I usually end up waiting till it's the time they're supposed to arrive, and then end up waiting even further till the time they get where ever it is I'm supposed to meet them. LOL, this time was surprisingly different, she got there earlier than I did! LOL NEVER happened before, especially since I usually arrive at these kinda outings early.
Shant blog about the middle part =) rather not publicise everything.
Met up with Jordan and Chuw teck after that and went for basketball! hehe! First warm-up abit, then played match, then played ElephantS=.=, then Got FREAKING FUN!
HEHE! Kay Rui suggested playing one-on-one, first to 3, and then loser out. DAMN SHIOK SIA!
Kay Rui started against me, beat him 3-nil. Jordan came in after kay rui, beat him 3-nil, Chuw Teck came in after Jordan, beat him 3-nil, CHIOBU WENT MISSING!?, Jordan came back in BECAUSE CHIOBU WENT MISSING, lols, if she played I think I'd have lost, hehe, you just cant bully girls, anyway, beat him 3-nil! LOLS! 12-NIL! I Feel So ACCOMPLISHED!! COMPLETE OWNAGE! HEHE!!
Left out alot, =) I'd rather keep such stuff in my own memory =)!
Now....


































I'm GONNA WATCH PCK! NITES!xD

When nothing seems to work,
And no one gets things done right,
Get it done,
Yourself.

But sometimes,
When nothing seems to work,
When life gets you down,
And no one gets things done right,

It was worthwhile,
having friends that actually tried,
tried to get things done right,
and for that,

I'm grateful.





Anyway, to blog about ytd,
Brian came over at round 11-ish, Russell at about 10-ish.
Brian helped jailbreak my iphone
then played a bit of xbox, then left for Zheng Rong's place.

Played left4dead, (both russell and brian =.=) on 2 coms side by side each other, and I was sitting behind looking at them play, one person shooting zombies with sniper, other person shooting zombies with pistol =.= one zooming in and out with sniper, other wan chionging around the battlefield spinning 360 degrees everywhere and shooting like nuts, MADE ME DIZZY like anything =.= I fainted.
=.= did u believe I fainted? I was just testing ya, LOL
Anyway, xD hehe, then played Call Of Duty, for quite awhile, 2 hours at least, then left for home.
Russell went home, Brian accompanied me to tm^^ cause he could have taken another bus home anyway, (thanks!), and then he took another bus home from tampines mall=.=
Bought the gift, now wondering if i should wrap it..
C'mon justin, it's a gift, go wrap it, Or, No justin, it's too big, and it's weird to wrap it, dont wrap.
Who should I listen to? shucks, I think I wont, it's weird to wrap it.. plus my wrapping skills arent exactly all that good if I remember correctly=.= gtg
bye

hais, nice and dreadful day.
woke up 7am, quite usual, but I've made plans to meet jordan at his house at 8 for basketball later on.
Brought all my work over there, woke jordan up, and gatecrashed^^
did work all the way till 930 or so, only managed to finish half of the victoria paper emaths.. Kay rui arrived, after getting caught in the storm raging outside, then chuw teck arrived, and he hooked me on to Call Of Duty 4 on jordan's ps3:D first time playing it, owned and GOT OWNED =.= ^^ at least I owned kay rui, hehehe!

Went all the way to parkway to get a ball, and all the way back to school to get jordan's homework as well as play basketball, and guess what? Mr OM stepped out of the front office as soon as we entered the main gate, and starts pointing at the security guard followed by in our direction, Yes OM I'm here to rob ur stupid school=.=, clever as always, but we were actually there to get jordan's homework as well as play basketball,why am I repeating myself..? anyway, Back to my story, kay rui needed to go to the toilet urgently but the OM refused to let him into the school toilets^^, at least something happy came out of all of that xD. anyhow, kay rui barged his way into the toilet, Jordan barged his way into the classroom for his books, and then when i wanted to barge into the basketball court, we were barged out of school, a happy ending, for OM. I'm gonna burn down his house.

No worries, time for plan B! Went back to jordan's place to unload his books and went to Geylang serai to play basketball ^^

Played for barely 5 minutes and Mr Choy decided to fall down cause the court was slippery, then he decided that playing barefooted was safer, so he took off his shoes, and I remember telling him something like "I bet there's gonna be someone else who falls down, wanna bet?", he gave me that =.= look. I'm a good fortune teller by the way.

15 minutes later, chuw teck wee falls down.

10 minutes after that, kay rui and his sharp fingernails poked me on the left hand, and blood starts to come out from the tiny spot he poked. He said sorry.

5 minutes after that I fall down, grazed MY OWN knee, and landed on MY OWN hand at the same time. wasnt that just a wonderful experience, took the words right out of my mouth and threw it right back at me head on, yup, it was nice, blood was nice too, pain as hell. Also, i rmb kay rui saying something like "Somebody said others were gonna fall down" or something like that. must be retribution:(

So I went to the toilet, cleaned up the wound, came back out, started playing again, and guess what? Yeah that's right, fell down again, I fell down AGAIN. Isnt that just great, the court hates me. =.=landed on my hand this time and it hurt like **** inside. I think I ought to be wearing a kelvar to play basketball to just lessen the damage 20 minutes in a basketball court can actually do to me.

gave up, sat down for about 20 minutes, and MADE SURE THE COURT WAS DRY before I started playing again. Come to think of it, it's a miracle I actually could stand up and play, lols, wound looks nasty, dont think I've ever gotten a wound like this since at least 4 years ago or maybe even longer, but it's not as bad as it looks, mind over matter =).

went for piano tuition, teacher said the usual, that if i dont practice for the exam this september, he's gonna pull me out, and that if I took it, and failed, he'd be sacked, :( feel very sad, seriously, dont feel like practising.. but i dowan make him lose his job lehs.. he not joking wan leh, seriously gonna get sacked if i fail :( howhowhow... MANS THIS SUCKS!

I'm bored.. 1030 at nite, knee still scarlet red, hand has a pokadot on it, piano haven practice, I WAAANA GO TO SLEEP AND FORGET EVERYTHING FOREVER. I think if snow white was alive I need her poisoned apple... can you help me find it. Prince charming can get lost too, he can go kiss shrek, neither of them should come kiss me after I've take Snow White's apple..
Somebody help me, I need a remedy that can save my life.

lols, extremely ecstatic day today. school was not too shabby too.
1st lesson, emaths, came in late.. went through lessons as normal, did my homework, brought my books, no complaints.
then was chem, boring as usual, oxidation regarding H2, and the same rate of reaction thing.
then english^^ me and jordan went to the hall to play piano when it was closed, there's actually a way to get in =) my way. the auntie usually leaves either a shutter or door unlocked. and we came back late for english lesson, abt 5-10 minutes roughly, and i couldnt find wherever my part of the class went to, so i just stayed in 4A, =) lazy walk around anyway.
after school, went to seoul gardens for a buffet! 14 dollars and 50 cents per person, cooked our own eggs, teriyaki chicken, squid, other types of chicken, beef, ate ice cream, clams, noobls, bee hoon, and i made the pan all full of egg white =.= so hard to cook with the equipment provided, and the service was lousy, food was good though, and the place was a mess later on, but meanwhile, i went to go get 4 pao to eat, and when i brought the 4 pao back on a large plate everybody stared at me and started laughing =.= and chuw teck wee, stupid! laugh at the joke he didnt catch, made kay rui laugh, and then i started laughing, laughed for 20 minutes over man, wtf!? him and his buns and bakers =.= idiot. and xin ni was standing up eating for about 15 minutes and i didnt get why.. and then we did =.= that was the most interesting theology I've learnt in my life =.=
Went for a Movie, the A-Team, walao! Not bad sia! I think I'll give it about 8-8.5/10 for rating! ^^! Xin Ni missed her xiao niang re show, Lols! and chuw teck wee and jordan "helped" me.. Left and told ppl my story of the ritesh at chem lab =.= hope it never happens again. going for another movie in about an hour with parents, karate kid, wonder whether it'lll be just as nice..
Will be in msia from sunday to tuesday, quite the issue, hais, then wednesday come back immediately got piano tuition, i think he'll kill me, haven practiced again. tmr have 2 piano tuitions (same teacher but 2 time slots) and chinese tuition in the morning, overkill.
gtg. byes! movie time.

Real nasty day today.. some parts still worth mentioning..
Started my day in school with laughter, that's good. 1st recess, very standard, I'll go get a green tea from the canteen, then go back to class. did that.
stuff it, I'll skip the boring stuff. After amaths, stayed back in audi with kay rui to play piano for a while. then went off for physics.
After school, all the bad stuff starts happening, played basketball while waiting for english oral. played 30 minutes or so, fell once, almost sprained my ankle. sweating like nobody's business. went to drink water cooler, drank 3 mouth-full, then I realised the water's milky! WTF!? i felt like drinking listerine after that.. milky like limewater mixed with co2, that standard of milky. bloody hell. then went to toilet, upress the tap, brown colour water starts splurting out, WTF?! press the tap 2s later water all turn from transparent to yellow-brown. stuff it, went to buy water from canteen.
later on, which actualy means all the way up till now, I have developed a splitting headache.. worst headache I've got since god-knows-when. lie down on my bed only it spontaneously comes back, get up from my back also the same, walking around not so bad. went to bed for 2 hours or so, it's much better, but still bad.. ran out of panadol, gonna get some soon.
yesterday's workout and today's basketball also didnt match very well, stamina completely drained, carry my bag back from school also out of breath.. completely drained, when I reached back home it was as if I just ran 1.6, perspiring, but not alot, still, not normal. no more basketball till this rubbish is over..
I need a break.

Off the playlist song before reading, song and mood dont match at all today. Weird day in school. lemme tell you my story.
first thing in the morning, had to hand in chinese homework to huang lao shi. the moment i drop it into her box, stomach ache. made my way to the nearest toiet, no tissue paper, die. run to drink stall ask uncle got paper or not, then run into esther, said hi, went into toilet. 3 dots, rush back to classroom, find out nobody's in class, and cant find my chemistry materials, just lovely isnt it. in sec 4 we happen to have privileges, like when we enter class late, we dont get shot by teachers, so being me, i entered politely and got to my seat. Then had to do some practical, which she told all of us to put 5g of calcium carbonate into 50cm^3 of Hydrochloric acid, put in only 5 second later like no more reaction already and my expiermient look like mlik, dont know WHAT exactly went wrong. then check other people's everybody also took cher's advice, everybody also got milk, i told myself to screw it, i did. Chem cher gave us homework, sleepy. gave us more homework, going to sleep. and then finally, she let us off, no more sleepy.
physics lesson, tried to pay attention to what the cher had to say, but jordan was trying to get attention too, i lost some to him, meaning i lost some to soend on cher too, meaning i lost some info somewhere, i just havent found out where yet. explaining dc and ac current, ms lim explained both alr, then some idiot asked a question cause he didnt understand, and ms/mrs/mdm (?) Neo(?) took the mike from ms lim and started explaining. Dont know why, but when she explain, the tone she was using made me anxious, cause she started talking with the tone as if you dont know anything like that, and she repeated whatever ms lim said again, and then i felt lost=.= which idiot asked the question. anyway, next came the physics test, which i cant really say was a test, jordan was helping me here and there and ms lim was giving tips. :D i'm beginning to think ms lim isnt such a confusing teacher after all ^^! After the test, jordan looks at his back, which has now turned from black to white, and asks me why it has changed colour??? I said "I dont know, where did you put it?" he smells it and tells me "next to gorvind", and then asks me to smell it too=.=. I said okay (cause I'm a nice guy =)!!), smelled it, and it smelled exactly like those kinda coconut oil on indian's heads. I look at him, he look at gorvind, gorvind looks at us and says "what?" Jordan starts complaining, Gorvind says it's not his fault, dot dot dot. must be accidentally spilled some powder or something that is somehow related to coconut oil on jordan's bag xD hehehehe.
Last period, what was it again? stml.. social studies! copied slides until hand pain, while ms nani i think was reading alot off the slides.. anyway, that serves as notes. very tiring, yawned like anything..
Bio period, jordan looks at me, smiles, and starts using his paper to do chromatography with his pen ink with the eiosin dye as a solvent, failed miserably, leaves for chemistry olympiad, and i had to help clean up =.=, not only that, after that must go ask Ms Tan somemore WHAT EXACTLY DO I DO WITH THE PAPER USED FOR HIS CHROMATOGRAPHY EXPERIMENT, ms tan looks at me, smiles, stops smiling, shakes her head, tells me to keep it for him, WHY MUST I KEEP IT FOR HIM!? Jordan I hope ur reading ThIs, u owe me BIG after all that. And to think he chopped me with his celery-eiosin-custom-made-chop on my arm TWICE, and now got two weird red marks on my arm =.= HE OWES ME HIS LIFE. RIGHT!? =.= SHUCKS. AND HE VANDALISED MY BOOK TODAY =.=. I'm A Freaking Victim, Imma gonna play some prank soon! =.= now must think up prank 1st.
9pm showing starting soon=) cant wait. see ya!